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England and Wales High Court (Family Division) Decisions |
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You are here: BAILII >> Databases >> England and Wales High Court (Family Division) Decisions >> P v B [2003] EWHC 327 (Fam) (27 February 2003) URL: http://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/EWHC/Fam/2003/327.html Cite as: [2003] EWHC 327 (Fam) |
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FAMILY DIVISION
Strand, London WC2A 2LL |
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B e f o r e :
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Ian P | Applicant | |
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Norma B | Respondent |
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Miss Lucinda DAVIS (instructed by Andrew & Andrew Solicitors) for the respondent
Mrs Susan Young for CAFCASS
Hearing dates: 10 and 11 February 2003
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Crown Copyright ©
Mr Justice Sumner:
Introduction
The background
Present dispute
The hearing
CAFCASS Reporter
Father's evidence
Submissions on behalf of the mother
Adjournment of the case
"It would have been greatly to Norma B' benefit if she had been able to enter into a therapeutic relationship in order to work through some of the anguish that she must have felt. The stress of the situation and the knowledge that she, herself had, as she undoubtedly viewed it, been betrayed, would have undermined her parenting skills as well as her self confidence and self esteem. It is extremely painful for women to face the reality that the natural father of their child or children is no longer committed to them in an affectionate relationship and difficult for them to interpret that the father may, in fact, be committed to the child. Mr P in his discussions with me has pointed out how Norma seemed to have changed from the caring person that he remembered to somebody who is somewhat bitter and lacks warmth."
"Norma B cannot display her love for her daughter in emotional demonstrations but very much more in what she can make available to her. It was amazing to see the quantities of beautiful toys and games that C has been given. She also shows undue concern for her health and has felt that in no way could she let her go to school when she has any minor problem of infestation. The discussion of nits with the school and the fact that such on-going problems have been the reason/excuse Norma B has used in not allowing C to attend school, is all too obvious."
"The example of the Easter egg serves to show the minor difficulties that occur and which Norma B focuses on in the course of her on-going bitterness. It is unfortunate that C's mother has never been able to work through what are justifiable grievances, partly because her psychic pain has been so deep. The court will appreciate how saddened this mother is at the loss of her partner two years ago."
"Norma B is so caught up in the misery of rejection that she presents as almost delighting in finding further issues to criticise including Mr P's car, the question of it being taxed and insured. Any efforts he tries to make regarding presents, help over school attendance etc are regrettably seen in a negative light."
"Conclusion.
In the course of my assessment of the overall situation, several issues have become clear:
i) Ian P's Schedule 1 offences in the past under another name, are not considered by several experts to pose a threat and need to be put in the context of acts committed in his youth, following early sexual abuse, for which he served a prison sentence and which he has worked through.
ii) Norma B learned of these offences in 1994 or possibly earlier, through social services. It is likely that Mr P had not made the details about which she was entitled to know, very clear. Nevertheless, she continued her relationship with the father of her child, C P-B for another 2-3 years, with awareness of his past history, though possibly not adequate insight and understanding of what had transpired.
iii. c) Thus, it seems evident that Norma needs help to overcome the resentments that have developed out of genuine grievances and the devastating loss of a partner who was, and is, the father of her only child. My professional view is that psychotherapy or supportive counselling are crucial in helping this isolated mother, though it is acknowledged that any professional undertaking such work would encounter entrenched resistance.
f) I envisage that the aim should be for C's contact to be unsupervised and more frequent but I share with the court my lack of success in working out acceptable hand-over arrangements. I am convinced C needs increased contact and that if her father could meet her from school then a possible 1½ hour contact period once a week would enrich her life. I have discussed the possibility of Norma's brother Roger, assisting with hand-over but Norma refutes this totally."
Further submissions
Conclusions